Broken Jaw
by Sugarpeadesires
Summary: James T. Kirk wasn't a very serious guy. No… in fact, if you ask anyone on his crew (or anyone who's met him, actually), they would all look at you like you have suddenly grown a second head. Everyone who had met the young captain, in the Academy and on, would not say he was a very serious guy; unless, of course, you witnessed him on duty... Taking place after the events of STID
1. Chapter 1: JIM

**Author's Note: Alright gang, here it is. My first ever Star Trek Reboot fanfic. I'm so proud. For real.**

**Anyway, like I said, this is my very first time writing for this fandom, so if i make any mistakes, Im sorry.**

**I do my research, believe me.**

**Also, I suppose you could say this chapter is slow, because Spock isn't in it...YET. He is mentioned quite a few times though. **

**I have a basic plan for this story, although I'm not quite sure how long it will be.**

**But, without further ado, here it is, Chapter one~!**

Chapter One

James T. Kirk wasn't a very serious guy.

No… in fact, if you ask anyone on his crew (or anyone who's met him, actually), they would all look at you like you have suddenly grown a second head.

Everyone who had met the young captain, in the Academy and on, would not say he was a very serious guy; unless, of course, you witnessed him _on duty. _Needless to say, Jim had shocked nearly everyone with his brilliant, fearless adrenaline, and nearly perfect leadership skills at the early weeks of his captaincy. Not to mention when he laid down his life to save his crew, his family, during the warp core incident.

But no one would be mentioning that anytime soon.

…..

Anyway, serious really wasn't the correct word to use when describing the captain on any other circumstance. It's like using the words 'cheerful' and 'Vulcan' in the same sentence. It just doesn't sound right. Jim always seemed to have a huge, bright grin on his face, his every step seeming to have a cocky swagger and unwavering confidence to it. He joked, jabbed, grinned, and charmed his way into everyone's heart at some point or another( and not just because of his crazy flirting spree, the love between him and _most _of his crew was a familial thing.) His happiness _and_ smarts seemed to earn him quite a few friends. Not even Bones, the grumpy country doctor, could deny that he held a fondness for Jim; no matter how much of a pain in the ass the damn prick could be.

Now, as for a certain half-Vulcan first officer….

Jim knew they'd started out pretty bumpy.

But he thought they were past it, because he and Spock have been nursing(at least, Jim was _trying _to) a budding friendship for the past while.

Jim was fond of Spock…..

And although the stuffy guy would never say it aloud, Jim _knew_ that Spock was starting to become fond of _him._

Jim was irresistible.

Er…he meant that in a completely friendly, platonic way.

Yup. Very, very platonic indeed.

…..right.

Spock, being the scientific observer that he was, also saw Jim as a 'Most illogical and emotional individual'. Or at least that's how he would put it. Jim was very sure of it.

Jim Kirk was cataloged as a joyous being.

And that was that.

OoOo

For Jim, the day was filled with boring, uneventful nonsense.

After his shift ended on the bridge, he left, giving Sulu the conn. He approached the turbolift at a slow pace, stepping inside and going up to the corridor, where he had a hot date with his desk and paperwork.

Man, Jim_ loved_ paperwork. He fucking adored it.

It's not like it's the most boring, mind-numbing thing in the world, and he could honestly find something else to waste his time doing while off-shift. No sir.

With a heavy sigh, Jim shuffled into his quarters, in no rush to get to his paperwork. That crap could wait until he got to the desk.

Almost after an hour of paperwork, Jim's head started to hurt after trying to read the same thing over and over again. His brain was doing the thing it does when it's tired of reading, blurring the words together and not processing the information inside the text. After what seemed like the umpteenth time Kirk read the sentence, he decided he deserved a break.

Yes, a break sounded like heaven.

Setting his PADD down with the many others assembled on his desk, Jim walked out of his quarters and paused, deciding on what to do. There was always bothering Bones-he always got a kick out of that. Grinning at his oh-so great idea, the cheerful captain made his way down to sickbay, where the seemingly grumpy creature, Leonard Mccoy resided. While at the entrance, he waved to the nurses on duty, who all…..seemed to be staring at him strangely. Weird.

He found Mccoy in his office, the tribble he had kept (after resurrecting the poor fur ball) sitting in a cage on the far side of the room. The doctor was sitting on his desk, staring at his pet with indiscreet interest. Jim stopped just inside the door, and Mccoy looked up after a moment of silence.

He narrowed his eyes.

"Damn it Jim, you look like you've seen better days." was his response.

Jim looked at him in clear confusion.

"Huh?"

"Have ya even _looked _at yourself in the mirror? You look like a damn bus ran you over!" Bones replied, approaching him slowly with a tri-corder. Jim held up his hands, as if Bones had just produced a weapon.

"Uh…." He started. To be completely truthful, Jim really hasn't checked his reflection since this morning, and even then he hadn't liked what he saw. When he looked in the mirror, he was met with a pale face, dull eyes, and dark circles under usually _alive_, sharp blue eyes. So Jim couldn't imagine what he looked like _now_. No wonder Sulu and Chekov looked concerned throughout half of the day; hell, even _Spock_ looked worried.

Jim thought he concealed it well enough…..apparently not.

"I'm gonna take that as a 'no'." Mccoy grumbled absently, glancing at the readings of his tri-corder. "Honestly Jim, would it hurt you to sit the hell down for once and take _care_ of yourself? From what I can tell; from my readings _and_ from just _**common sense**_, which by the way, you seem to lack, you haven't slept in _forever_!" Forever may have been an exaggeration but Bones was actually very concerned.

"God, Bones, it hasn't been that long…" Jim mumbled, running a hand through his slightly messy hair. He attempted to smooth it out, with little success.

Of course Jim hadn't slept in what had _seemed_ like forever. His dreams wouldn't allow it.

But Mccoy didn't know that. And Jim decided that he didn't want the man pestering him about it, so he kept quiet.

"Jesus Jim, whatever. I don't care if I'm exaggeratin' the time a bit, You need to get some sleep before you collapse from exhaustion." Bones concluded, putting his tri-corder away again. He then shuffled behind his desk, opening a drawer, and spent the next 5 minutes shifting through its contents.

…He pulled out a hypo.

Jim blanched (if that were even _possible _now). Then he chuckled nervously. "…..What's that?"

"This? Oh," he then waved the hypo in his hand "_This_ is a sedative. For sleepy times." He seemed to be deriving a sick pleasure from Kirk's obvious horror. Slowly, he inched his way towards Jim, a grin twisting upwards on his face.

"Nononono! That's alright; I'll try sleeping on my own thank-you very much!" Jim exclaimed nervously, backing away at surprising speed. By the time he was at the thresh-hold, Mccoy lowered his hand, scowling.

"That's what I thought. Go sleep. Now. Or next time I won't hold back." He threatened.

Jim followed his CMO's orders, almost running back to his quarters and going to bed, deciding the paperwork could wait.

Of course, when he _did_ fall asleep, it was anything but peaceful.


	2. Chapter 2: JIM

**AN:**** Another update. I decided to try and do another chapter before i forgot to update altogether, the next few weeks are gonna be busy.**

**Just a warning for people who didn't see Into Darkness, SPOILERS AHEAD. ALSO thank all of you who are following me and favoriting this story! It means SO much to me. and thanks for the reviews! I need the joy in my life right now.**

**anyway, long ass AN aside, here's chapter 2!**

Chapter 2

Jim's dreams turned out to be one big nightmare. Or, rather, not _**just**_ a nightmare, but a past event. One that he didn't want to think about. **Ever.**

His mind did not feel the same, however.

OoOo

_As Jim weakly crawled out of the warp core, only one thought remained stuck in his skull as everything in his system was slowly failing._

_He saved the crew._

_He had done his job, and saved the lives of the people he was fond of._

_Jim gasped, dragging his body toward the glass projecting the outside world that was his _Enterprise_. God-it was so hard to breath. No matter how hard he tried…..he just…..just couldn't get enough __**air.**__ His life was slowly but surely draining away, and he knew it. He knew he was fighting a losing battle._

_So much for not believing in no-win-scenarios._

_In the back of his mind, the sound of rushed footsteps filled his ears as he gasped for breath, tilting his head back to rest against the wall. His vision was becoming slightly blurry, and Jim fought to keep his eyes open._

_Spock was on the other side of the door._

_He saw Spock's form drop into a crouch in front of the glass-his face was twisted in horror….and…..sadness…? Jim threw his body against the wall behind him, feeling defeated. He couldn't win this one. At least Spock would be there with him when he took his final breath._

_Spock stared at his weak body, briefly tapping his palm on the glass to get his attention. Jim reached up, a harsh cough racking his body, and closed the door behind him with another gasp. He turned to look at Spock, who had been staring at him with the grief filled expression on his face the whole time._

_Gathering up his energy, he managed a whisper._

"…_..How's our ship…?"_

_Spock blinked, eyes glistening, and hesitated for a moment before answering._

"_Out of danger," Another deep pause."You saved the crew." _

_Jim looked up at the half-Vulcan, which took a lot of effort._

"_You used what he wanted against him….that's a nice move." He muttered, his voice sounding rough as Jim nodded his head._

"_It is what you would have done."_

"_And this…..this is what you would've done." Dull blue eyes flickered up to meet glistening brown. "It was only logical."_

_A long pause. Another harsh intake of breath. It was becoming harder to breath, to think, to….to _**talk.** _He had to keep going though; he needed one more conversation with his first officer. He needed….._

" _I'm scared Spock. Help me not be…." Jim voiced his fears. "How…do you choose not to…feel?"_

"_I do not know," Spock choked out. His voice was filled with more emotion than Jim had probably ever heard from his first. "Right now I am failing." _

_Jim's eyebrows slowly went up, and for a second, he tried to grin, to reassure Spock everything would be okay, even though it was obvious he wasn't going to make it. _

_He couldn't._

"_I want you to know why I couldn't let you die…."_

_He faltered._

"…_.why I went back for you." He wanted to say it…..but the words wouldn't leave his lips._

"_Because you are my…friend." Spock concluded, a single tear falling down his face. Jim bobbed his head weakly, chest heaving faster now as he tried to breath. He threw his hand onto the glass, not being able to speak anymore, to convey what he had wanted to say._

_Spock…..lifted his hand in a Vulcan salute, hand shaking slightly, and placed it on the glass over Jim's. Jim's fingers slowly spread into the same salute as well and Spock looked at him; another tear sliding down his grief stricken face. _

_Jim gazed at their hands, light slowly ebbing from his eyes, and then stared at Spock._

…_The things he could have shared with him ran through his head for a second as he felt his life leaving him._

_With another sharp gasp, Jim used the last of his energy, and a ghost of a smile traced his lips as his eyes glazed over and he took his final breath._

_He fell into darkness._

_OoOo_

Jim woke with a sharp gasp.

…He was alive.

It had just been a memory.

A horrible, horrible memory.

As he tried to calm the hell down, he unclenched his hands (which were fisted in his bed sheets), and he sat up. He didn't think he was asleep for very long, and then after a spacious, silent 30 seconds, realized the door buzzer was going off. Damn. Whoever it was, they had bad timing. With reluctance, he dragged himself carefully out of bed, pushing the dream into the far and darkest corner of his mind to deal with later. He also had to give himself a thorough shake, just so he would stop trembling.

The door swished open…and of course it was none other than Mr. Spock.

Oh joy; life couldn't give him a break, could it?

Jim didn't mean to be so harsh; usually he enjoyed Spock's company…. a lot. Like, _a lot, _a lot_. _It's just…he didn't want the dream to bother him right now. He sighed heavily, crossing his arms and lifting his blue eyes to glance at the Vulcan's face.

"…..Spock." was all that came out.

Spock gave him a some-what assessing look, no doubt taking in his shitty appearance. For some odd reason, that made Jim feel embarrassed.

"Jim. Is this not an efficient time?" he asked, folding his arms behind his back.

Jim wanted to say 'Well, yeah, actually it isn't. I just had a dream or memory or…whatever about me dying and you looking like you were in agonizing emotional pain. So…tootles!", but he couldn't bring himself to send the other man off. Instead, shifting his weight to his other foot, he avoided Spock's intense gaze.

"Nope. Not at all my good friend." He moved from the doorway and Spock stepped in, the door swishing shut behind him.

….and….

Spock was still staring at him.

Jim found that unsettling.

…and slightly…

_No._

Stop that. Bad Jim. Bad captain.

"What?" he grumbled finally, running a hand through his messy, sweat soaked hair. Ew. He'd have to do something about that later. Spock blinked at him after a long moment.

"…..Are you well Jim?" Spock asked hesitantly, but besides that, he betrayed nothing. As to be expected. Jim fought with his indecision.

On one hand, he can tell Spock about his nightmare.

On the other, he could just lie.

…Lying it is.

"Yes. I'm very good, thank-you Mr. Spock."

… .

Usually, he just called Spock….well, _Spock._ So this would be considered a slip up. Damnit.

"You are lying." The Vulcan stated simply, raising an eyebrow. Jim sighed again, and then chuckled humorlessly, sitting on his unmade bed.

"Okay fine. You caught me red handed." He said, which earned him both eyebrows this time at the use of a metaphor.

"It's a metaphor."

Spock inclined his head, staying where he was, which was fine with Jim.

"What is troubling you Captain?"

Jim's frown deepened, and he lowered his head into his hands.

Jim wasn't sure how to broach the topic.

Ever since it happened, and after Jim woke up, they had avoided speaking of it at all costs. They somehow managed it. It was as if it never happened, and Jim never, ever thought about it until his dream.

"…I haven't slept in awhile." He started, even though he was sure Spock could tell by just _looking at_ him. He pushed on. "I've been having nightmares."

"…If you do not mind my asking, what are they about?" Spock inquired after a moment's pause. Jim took a deep breath.

And nothing came.

He tried again.

"I….they're about…..," he swallowed "My…..uh…..incident."

Oh.

Spock's eyes took on a hard look and his body stiffened.

Uh oh. Jim hadn't meant for him to react like that.

What had he expected? Maybe he shouldn't have told him after all.

"The…..warp core incident?"

Jim nodded, pulling his head out of his hands to get a full view of Spock the Pillar.

Spock's jaw clenched shut audibly, and Jim fell silently.

"…Spock."

Spock's gaze locked with his.

Ehem.

"Yes Jim?"

"It was so vivid…..I can remember…." He faltered. "I can remember almost everything." _Including what I felt during my last moments with you_, his mind added.

Spock seemed to ponder this silently while Jim gazed at him.

"I….see." He said, almost distractedly, brown eyes heavy with an expression Jim had seen at least 2 different times now.

_Sadness._

Jim wasn't used to it.

He needed to change the subject now. His head was going into uncharted territory. Clearing his through awkwardly, he almost shrank back at Spock's concerned gaze.

Fuck.

What was he saying again?

Right. Distraction time.

"So…..uh…..you wanna play chess?" he asked, getting up to go find his set on a shelf in the corner of his room. Spock seemed to come back from wherever, his eyes becoming normal again. His eyebrows rose at Jim's unsubtle change of topic.

"That would be…..acceptable."


	3. Chapter 3: JIM

**AN: Jesus christ, it is kind of hard to write Spock from Kirk's point of view. I'm afraid I haven't done it correctly. Have I?**

**Hm...anyway, here's chapter 3! I promise it will get more interesting beyond chess, the next few chapters are gearing up for something. These first few chapters are setting up for the plot. **

**C**hapter 3

Jim and Spock had a hobby.

As weird as it sounds, this was true.

They both couldn't quite remember how it came to be, although Jim had a sneaking suspicion this ritual of theirs had started sometime while he was confined in one of Starfleet's medical hospitals in San Francisco, after he woke up. Jim had been terribly bored, which meant he was up and, as Bones would put it, "Trying to give everyone a goddamned heart attack". He couldn't help it though; it was so _boring _being stuck here, even if he just came back from the dead.

….Jim seriously needed to get his priorities straight.

Spock had found him in the hospital one evening, sitting up in his assigned bed. He looked really frustrated, a slight scowl twisting his features. When Spock approached, that scowl changed into a slightly timid smile in greeting. It was remarkable how quickly his mood could change when Spock was in the vicinity. At that thought, Jim's gleaming smile grew wider.

"Hello Capt - Jim." Spock corrected himself, still slightly unused to calling Jim his actual name. He now stood at what has become his almost usual spot, glancing down at the other. His expression was held subtle curiosity as his head tilted ever so slightly. It was oddly… endearing.

"Hi Spock." The grin never faltered.

"May I inquire as to why you seemed to be greatly discouraged when I arrived?" Spock queried, his arms behind his back in his usual stance. As if remembering his annoyance, Jim's face returned to its previous expression and he carefully crossed his arms.

"One of the nurses caught me while I was taking a walk around the place," he frowned "I have a feeling Bones told all of the nurses to be on a look out for me, because about 5 of them came and made sure I stayed put."

One of Spock's eyebrows made its way up his hairline.

"….Moving around after such a….. dire event is illogical and ill-advised. I'm sure even doctor Mccoy had well enough reasoning capabilities to come to this conclusion, thus leaving you where you are now." Spock stated matter-of-factly, his voice tinged slightly with distaste.

"Oh c'mon Spock, I'm fine. I can walk around without keeling over for a few minutes. And besides, I tend to cause more harm when I'm sitting around on my ass all day." He grumbled, picking at the seams of the sheets. In all honesty, not only was he bored, but he moved around a lot because it kept him from thinking too deeply. The thoughts that were coming to Jim were not only distracting; they made him feel something unfamiliar; almost like a depression.

He had decided since about the first week of being alive again, he would never think of her or his past again. _Never._

It certainly didn't help that she probably already knew what had happened to him either.

Spock blinked at him.

"I find that somewhat difficult to believe." He replied, his lips twisting downwards for a second before his facial expressions went back to being its normal neutrality. Jim snorted, running a hand through his short blonde hair.

"Whatever….." trailing off, Jim suddenly got an idea. His eyes brightened visibly as he made to pull the covers off and jump out of bed.

One look from Spock told him that was a very bad idea.

It seemed to convey 'Jim, we just got done discussing the prospect of you wondering around, so if you know what's good for you…..sit the fuck down'. Although, Spock probably wouldn't have said it like that.

Imagine if he did though.

Jim shook his head with a quiet chuckle, placing his hands into his lap and staring up at the Vulcan.

"So, Spock, you play chess?"

OoOo

As the year went by, Jim and Spock would hang out in sickbay, playing chess and displaying their own individual and intellectual plans and strategies. Jim's were more convoluted and unorthodox; while Spock's were well thought out and logical, of course.

It made for some pretty interesting games.

Each time, Jim would trick Spock with his seemingly irrational moves, then he caught his opponent in the cleverly built traps. He never used the same plan twice, however. Spock would always raise an eyebrow at this, as he formulated his next move; never realizing that Jim was setting a trap.

At least that was how it had started out.

Spock seemed to catch on to Jim's pattern after about a month of this routine. He started to get better and better at guessing Jim's own moves, and thus won more often.

One day, he got curious and asked a question while they were playing.

"You seem to posses quite a bit of knowledge of this game Jim." He said absent mindedly, long pale fingers wrapping around one of Jim's white pieces that he already collected in the process of the game. Jim watched, distracted for a moment, before answering.

"I…..well, back when I was a little kid, I had an interest in it, so this kid I knew taught me." He started, staring at the board. "I played a lot of different people around that time, and I always won, which pissed people off," at this, he grinned "then, after…I got into high school, I just kind of gave it up. I didn't have much time for it." He confessed, glossing over a few minor details.

Like the fact that after Uncle Frank had drove his big brother Sam away, he trashed their father's car, and later got arrested. Therefore, he did not have the time for something like Chess anymore.

Thus Jim's life as a young outlaw was born.

So…..technically, he hadn't been lying when he said he didn't have the time. That had been true. But Spock didn't necessarily need to hear all of that. Not many outside of Iowa knew of it. It was something Jim kept tight-lipped about, and that's how it belonged.

"…..Fascinating." was all Spock said and they continued on in silence, Spock in concentration, and Jim, somewhat tense.

Checkmate.

Spock had won.

Damn it.

He frowned, crossing his arms with narrowed eyes.

"How did you do that?"

"To what are you referring to Jim?" Spock asked innocently, brown eyes snapping up to meet blue. One eyebrow rose up to his hairline.

Jim scoffed.

"You know what I meant Pointy." Jim grumbled, calling Spock by his secret pet name. He loved it because he _knew_ Spock hated it. It was made obvious by their little spat in Admiral Pike's office. Spock's eyebrows knitted together in exasperation, much to Jim's amusement.

"Do not refer to me Pointy." He said stiffly.

…..

Jim was sure his tired mind might have been playing tricks on him, but he could have sworn his friend's pointed ears were tinged a slight green.

Interesting.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. You know you love it."

"I do not 'love' being referred to as 'Pointy'."

"Don't change the subject." Jim said as he realized Spock hadn't answered his question. Spock's eyes had taken on an odd light, which Jim would later on associate with amusement. His heart did something….._odd._

_No, stop that, _he thought. Whether it was towards Spock or himself, he wasn't sure. Maybe both.

"It is simple. After a month of observing your own strategy, I have caught on to your plotting strategy, formulating a plan of success of my own. The odds of me winning were about 80.00%." Spock replied. Jim thought he caught a hint of smugness from his First Officer. His eyes were narrowed to slits now.

"You - _observant_ bastard." Jim chuckled, rubbing a hand behind his head with another toothy grin.

Spock's eyes were alight with humor now.

"Indeed. To borrow a human term, I believe I have 'schooled' you in this game of Chess." Spock replied, lips twitching ever so slightly.

Jim busted out laughing.

The sound seemed to lighten up the place.

_OoOo_

In their current game, Jim was winning, even with his lack of sleep.

Which was strange.

"Spock, are you going easy on me?" he mumbled, fingers wrapped around one of his white pieces.

Spock didn't answer.

"_Spock."_

"I believe there is no logical reason for me to 'go easy' on you Jim." Spock replied, taking his turn.

Jim's found his choice of words very…..interesting.

Ahem.

Back to Spock's Vulcan bullshittery.

"Bullshit."

Spock looked up then, his face wiped perfectly from emotion.

"…..Vulcan's do not lie."

"Really now? Funny, because I can totally tell that you are completely avoiding the question." Jim shot back, eyes narrowed. The game would soon be drawn to a close, and Jim knew he would win. The fact that Spock was _letting_ him win was taking the usual satisfaction away from the whole thing. Jim sighed inwardly-he knew deep down that Spock wouldn't be admitting to throwing the game anytime soon.

After they completed their match, they both picked up the pieces and put everything back at an even pace, Jim's quarters utterly silent as they both did so. It wasn't uncomfortable though-it was welcomed. When their task was completed, Jim looked over at the stack of PADDs on his desk that he hadn't finished. Oh boy.

Jim sighed. "Welp, guess I have to get back to my paperwork." Spock's eyes soon snapped over to the pile, giving it an once-over with an assessing gaze.

"Perhaps it would be prudent to postpone such activities until you have acquired proper rest." Spock suggested, eyes trailing back over to Jim's ragged appearance. It honestly was as bad as it had been all day; his 30 minutes asleep didn't do him any good.

"Are you shitting me? There is absolutely no way I am sleeping again tonight. Or **ever,** in fact." Jim groaned, shutting his eyes as his head tilted back to face his boring regulation colored ceiling. He knew he was being completely irrational because he'd _**need**_ to sleep at some point, he couldn't exactly fall asleep in the middle of the bridge, or in the middle of a crisis. His fatigue could affect his judgment and overall mental skills. But honestly, who could blame him? His dreams were going to drive him crazy, and perhaps even emotionally compromise him if it got _that_ bad.

" I assure you I am not." Spock replied quietly, eyebrows furrowing together in quiet consideration. "Humans can only withstand a certain period without rest. I could be correct by presuming that you have gone quite an extensive period without 'sleeping'?"

Jim nodded his head, eyes still shut tightly.

"It would be unwise to continue this practice. Your mental and physical health could be affected during this long period without sleep. It is also illogical, seeing as you are the captain of this vessel, and should be alert in case of possible emergency." Spock concluded, hands rested on the table in front of him as he stared intently at Jim, waiting for a response.

His eyebrows quirked as he got no response.

"Jim…..?"

The aforementioned eyes' had flown open in response.

"…..Huh?" he mumbled, rubbing his eyes. Spock shot him a look of stern disapproval, which seemed to say 'I told you so'.

"Perhaps I should leave so you can accomplish sufficient rest." Spock said, moving to stand from his chair. Jim blinked rapidly to get his vision to focus. His face took on a drowsy frown as it seemed to hit him, just how_ tired_ he felt. It was as if Spock's lecture had ironically _opened _his eyes to how run down he really was. Kirk's thick eyebrows furrowed together.

"…..Sure, okay Spock." He stood with a stretch and a stifled yawn, and turned to face him.

Spock inclined his head.

"Goodnight Jim."

And with that he was gone.

Jim's mind lacked a dream to harass him with….


	4. Chapter 4:JIM

**An: Sorry this chapter took so long. I've been busy and I wanted to get it just right. **

Chapter 4

The next morning, Jim received new orders from Starfleet concerning their next mission.

From what he'd gathered, they were heading to a relatively newly discovered planet (at least, new to the Federation) named Vurita II. The orders were for a diplomatic type of mission, and from the looks of it, they would be staying for quite a few days. This was all fine and dandy.

Until Jim remembered he isn't exactly _great_ at diplomatic missions.

Sure, he could play pretend and act like a complete gentleman, but in the long run, it can sometimes become a disaster. Something could be mistranslated, he could be misread, or he could just plain fuck it up. Who knew what kind of cultural thingies he could forget/assume in a short amount of time?

Well, at least the people were not a hostile bunch. According to the files he was sent.

Now standing tall on the bridge in his usual captain-ly stance, Jim turned to give Sulu his orders, a big grin on his face despite his nerves. His First Officer was standing behind him, his usual mask applied to his every feature.

"Mr. Sulu, set a course for Vurita II." He spoke, aware of the silence on the Bridge besides the usual beep and hum of technology. His smile never faded.

"Yes sir." Sulu replied, setting to work with a smile of his own. Next to Hikaru sat Pavel Chekov, the young Ensign prodigy already working at his station, a look of pure concentration painted across his face. Everything seemed to be in order, everyone working at their individual stations as usual, so as Chekov made the ship-wide announcements, Jim turned back to the view screen, the stars twinkling as they made their way to the planet. Ah, the beauty of space.

This is one of the things Jim loves about his job.

The scenery.

He had always_ loved _stars. Ever since he was little, Jim was amazed by the twinkling diamonds of space, often gazing out in the fields of Iowa when night time fell. His mother, Winona Kirk, would even tell him stories of her travels in space. She told him about the encounters she had with extraordinary species, beautiful planets, amazing animals.

She would point out the age-old constellations to him, when she had the time. Even after she seemed to abandon him on Earth, he still was fond of the stars and the stories they still held.

As Jim took a minute to bask in his surprisingly innocent little piece of nostalgia, he almost failed to notice Uhura staring intently at his first officer. Almost.

He snapped out of his thoughts, electric blue eyes drifting over to where his Communications Officer was sitting, and, as it seemed, was trying to burn a hole through Mr. Spock's head. Jim frowned in slight confusion. What was wrong now? He thought they had made up _awhile_ ago, so why did Uhura look like she was about to jump out of her chair and violently assault the Vulcan? He made a mental note to pull Spock aside and ask him later.

He turned his eyes to said First Officer, who was staring ahead, surprisingly oblivious to Nyota's poisonous glare. Either that or he was purposefully acting as if he didn't notice. Jim's eyes narrowed marginally.

Finally, after about 2 minutes of glaring, Jim finally got tired of it.

If Uhura didn't know by now that she couldn't assassinate Spock **just** with her daggers-for-eyes, then damn, what choice does Jim have?

He then promptly - and subtly, mind you- cleared his throat with a pointed gaze towards her direction. Uhura looked kind of startled, as if she hadn't noticed him watching her for the past 3 minutes. She looked at him, regaining her composure.

"Is there something wrong with your throat, Captain?" she asked in her soft voice, and Jim turned to her, giving her his complete attention. His lips twitched.

"No no, my throat is fine. Just had a tickle in it is all." - he paused, running a hand through his hair before pushing on-" I can't help but notice how you seem to be having some….._problems_ with your _vision_." James T. Kirk, subtle man indeed. It took the lieutenant about 5 seconds-not that he was counting-to realize what he was referring to, and blanched before turning back to her station, answering in a normal tone. "No, sir. My eyes are fine."

"Good to know." Jim replied breezily, and left it at that. He knew he was being a bit of an asshole to Uhura, but she was starting to unsettle him, so what else would he have done?

The bridge was silent again as everyone went back to work, and Jim glanced over his shoulder…..

To notice Spock staring at Lieutenant Uhura.

He bristled slightly at this.

Jim – honest to god – had nothing against Uhura. In fact, their relationship had approved immensely after everything from the _Narada _incident to Kirk's death. In fact, when Jim gained consciousness (and after Spock had left him- which actually was a _long_ while afterwards) Uhura marched in, expressed her joy over him being alive – even thanking several deities from different cultures – biting her lip, as tears started to gather in her eyes…..

And she smacked him.

_**Hard.**_

"Don't _ever_ do something so stupid and…..and _heroic_ again!" she had exclaimed as he rubbed his left cheek, unable to keep the smile off of his face at the time. She continued to scold him for what seemed like hours until Bones finally shooed her away, grumbling about 'fucking the _hero's _face up goddamnit.' Something told Jim he was being sarcastic, but Uhura just laughed and left him alone soon after.

So, Jim wouldn't _exactly_ call his relationship with Uhura 'The Bestest Bridge Friends Ever' just yet. It was kind of like they were getting there though. It's like they had developed a begrudging respect for each other and worked from there, getting friendlier and friendlier as time went on.

Rather belatedly, he realized he had been standing there and doing not just short of what Uhura had been doing to Spock, so he pried his eyes away from the scene, gazing instead at the view ahead of him. After a moment's pause, he turned back towards their general direction, noticing with well concealed relief (at least he _hoped_ it was) that they were no longer holding a staring contest. Spock had walked back to his station, posture stiff and rigid, more so than usual. Uhura was looking at her work quietly, paying him no attention. Hm.

_Fascinating,_ Jim thought, slightly amused that he had stolen Spock's word.

He strode over to Uhura, stopping just close enough so he was right behind her shoulder.

"Lieutenant," he said as she looked up. " I want you to read through these long-winded files Starfleet sent me, all about the Vuritans and their language, body language, customs, anything like that. I already read a good chunk of this, I just need another pair of eyes to read through and see if I missed anything. Wouldn't want any miscommunications like the last time I did one of these missions." He mumbled the last part, recalling his first diplomatic mission a few months back with a small cringe. He knew diplomatic matters were difficult at first for anyone who _just_ learned the mechanics, but he'd rather be safe than sorry.

…

He could hardly suppress a shiver, remembering an absolutely _horrid_ dish he was forced to eat. He knew the color looked rather suspicious….

"Aye, sir." She answered, pulling up said files and setting to work, eyes flickering across each line with careful dedication. Jim was shaken out of his memory with her response. He nodded, walking behind his captain's chair and gearing himself for the long day ahead.

_OoOo _

It was the day before they were in orbit around Vurita II, and Jim was balls deep in all the information about the people. He was really trying hard to get things right this time around, he didn't want to accidently threaten the head of the group and getting into a battle leading to some not so awesome events to transpire. Uhura had come to him the evening of his request, which had been a week ago. She explained to him everything that came in the text, basically explaining everything he already figured out on his own.

Over the course of the week, Jim also kept a close eye on Spock and his interactions with Uhura, taking note of whenever he tensed in her presence or stiffly nodded, face betraying no emotion but his eyes telling otherwise. Uhura on the other hand would always stare at him with a great level of intensity, frowning whenever Spock addressed her as Lieutenant or just Uhura instead of Nyota when they were off duty. Jim had a sneaking suspicion that something was stirring between them, but couldn't get anything out of either of them, no matter how hard he prodded. A day ago, Jim had entered the turbo-lift with Uhura in it, and right when he was about to attempt to break the silence, she started bitching to him about Spock like the last time they did this. Jim just stood and listened, offering his two-cents to a very frustrated Nyota.

Spock on the other hand, seemed to be a bit…..distant. This bothered Jim to some extent, because this meant that Spock closed in on himself, not even being as subtly friendly as he was around Jim. His eyes seemed to be cold and calculating, no more humor that Jim was accustomed to lurking in the dark depths. Whenever they met to play chess, Jim tried to ask him about, and Spock would either answer with 'I have no comment on the matter' or 'I am well' or just plain 'Jim, my personal relationship with Lieutenant Uhura does not concern you. It would also be illogical to assume that there is anything awry with our interactions.' Jim continued to win their weekly matches, feeling nothing like a victorious winner when the win was technically half-assed.

After four days of this, Spock stopped answering all together, avoiding the question….or anything to do with Uhura period.

Jim was starting to become more and more concerned on both parties' behalf.

As he entered the Mess hall, he pondered all the evidence of tension between the two as he replicated an apple and took a sweet next to Bones, swiping a piece of the man's toast.

"Damnit Jim! You owe me another piece of toast." He grumbled, crossing his arms over his uniform. Jim just gave him a mocking grin as he took a bite, balancing his apple on a single finger. Bones scoffed, rolling his eyes and grumbling about how Jim was a clown as Carol sat down next to Mccoy, a huge grin on her face. She then proceeded to steal his other piece of _toast, waving between her fingers mockingly._

"Well Len, guess I get the last piece!" she cheerfully said, taking a bite. Jim gaped at her, jabbing his thumb dramatically in her direction.

"How come _I_ owe you more toast, but when she does it, she doesn't owe you jack-shit?" He whined, finishing the toast and moving on to his apple. Mccoy smirked at him.

"Well, for one, she's cute." He replied bluntly, and Carol smiled an almost smug smile, finishing off her toast. Jim glared playfully, faking a pained expression.

"You don't think _I'm _cute? I'm insulted! _Everyone _thinks I'm cute! Just look at this face."

Bones sneered. "That face is about as cute as a horse's ass -" he started.

Carol interrupted their jab fest. "Boys, boys, we're all cute here. No need to fight over _toast._" She giggles.

Jim bit into his apple, and Leonard smiled at the woman. Jim's eyed wandered around the Mess, looking for a certain young Vulcan. When he didn't see him, he turned back to Bones, gearing up to ask what he's been wondering for awhile now. "So….does anyone else notice how completely tense Spock and Uhura seem lately?"

Bones turned to look at him, and Carol tilted her head. "How so?" she asked.

"Oh, I don't know….every time I look at Uhura she looks like she wants to maim him, and Spock just seems to be somewhere else lately."

Bones and Carol sat quietly for a moment before Mccoy shrugged.

"Oh come on, I can't be the _only_ one that noticed." He replied, scrubbing his hands through his hair after putting the apple down on his tray, a huge bite taken out of the side.

"Maybe. You watch that damn hobgoblin so much, I wouldn't be surprised." Jim felt his cheeks warm at that as he sputtered for a response, nearly choking on his apple after Bones called him out. Had he been that obvious?

Jim ignored the statement as the hobgoblin in question entered the Mess silently, making his way to the replicator with smooth precision in his every step. As if to prove Mccoy's point, Jim's eyes wandered over to the sight of Spock, tracing, analyzing every line and curve in his posture. Jim tore his eyes away when Mccoy cleared his throat, motioning a hand vaguely in Spock's direction.

"See? It's almost vomit inducin', seein' you ogle at him."

"Shut up Bones, I'm _not_ 'ogling' him." Jim grumbled. "I'm not a twelve year old girl with her first crush."

And with that, he got up, leaving Carol and Mccoy to discuss whatever.

He still had his apple, taking another bite as he approached the table Spock was now sitting at. Spock didn't look up, sifting through his food as if to stare and process everything _before_ eating it. Jim found that kind of amusing actually.

"Hey Spock." He said, at last deciding to sit down next to him, only slightly in the man's personal space bubble. Spock was tense again, spine rigid and hard. Jim frowned slightly, hiding behind his apple.

"Jim." Spock mumbled, still not looking at him. Jim tilted his head, not sure what to say.

"…..You okay?" he knew it was a really stupid thing to ask, as if Spock would actually answer that. So when Spock spoke after a moment's pause, he was surprised.

"…..I…am well." He said, stopping in the middle of his sentence. Jim's eyes narrowed.

"Bullshit."

Spock decided not to comment, eyes flickering toward his face for a moment.

"Seriously Spock, what's up?" he asked, putting down his finished apple. Spock let lose a puff of air.

"I…am not well." He amended, and Jim shot him a look.

"I already figured as much," he said, then paused. Should he ask about Uhura now? It may seem to be a bit…. "Wait, is this because of you and Uhura?" insensitive.

Spock looked up in slight surprise, dark eyes locking with blue.

"Yes." He answered simply enough, shocking Jim yet again. Jim decided to push on, frown deepening.

"Is there anything…going on between you two? Like, negative I mean."Spock's lips twitched downward for a second.

"Lieutenant Uhura expressed that she was upset with me earlier this evening…" He mumbled thoughtfully, head tilted to the side and arched eyebrows furrowing.

"She seemed greatly upset that I have not contributed enough…emotion into our previous relationship. This is illogical, because as a Vulcan it is not our way to express our emotions freely as humans do. She and I continued to debate this matter until we mutually agreed that we terminate our relationship." Spock went on, setting his fork down and setting his hands in his lap. Jim looked at him.

"She broke up with you?" He clarified.

"It was a mutual agreement." Spock inclined his head stiffly at Jim's choice of words.

Jim fell silent at this. He had known something was going on, but he didn't think it was _that_ bad.

"I'm sorry." He settled on those two words, eyebrows furrowing together. Spock looked at him, eyes seeming to soften a little at his admission.

"Do not apologize. It is completely-"

"Illogical." Jim finished for him. Spock tilted his head, regarding him with….

What _was_ that? Whatever it was, it set Jim's stomach off, giving him a fluttery feeling.

_Stop that. _He didn't feel fluttery Dammit. He was a man.

….They were _**manly**_ fluttery feelings.


	5. Chapter 5:JIM

**AN:I'm so sorry this took so long! I've been very busy and been having some problems lately, so I've hardly had time to write. So this is the next chapter; the beginnings of shit going down. The next chapter may be written in Spock's POV i don't know; maybe help me decide in reviews? pretty please?**

Chapter 5

The next day had an easy enough start.

Which made Jim suspicious-the way this shit usually goes down is anything but easy if he's involved.

It had begun with the usual landing party procedures –he had chosen Spock, Uhura, Bones, and Carol, along with a few security guards to make sure everything went somewhat smoothly, and also to make sure that no one….. You know; tried to poison them. Uhura – he obviously brought her along for the sake of keeping himself from looking like an asshole in front of the natives, and also to make sure he didn't slip up. He brought Spock because he almost _always _had Spock on landing parties with him, especially for diplomatic missions. His Vulcan buddy was always there to be the voice of reason, keeping Jim in check and spewing useful facts from time to time about a certain subject Jim didn't know about. Kirk also liked to keep a close eye on him.

As if _Spock _was the one who needed close supervision.

Jim opted to bring Mccoy along because if anything went down with strange food or dangerous one-on-one fights occurred, he'd be in close range. The last time they had one of these missions, Jim had been convinced by a local elder to try a suspicious looking dish. He chose to ignore Spock's logical list of objections, and consumed the disgusting travesty that was referred to as 'food'.

He had instantly regretted it.

And Bones was aboard the ship during that time, so Jim had to suffer in silence on the surface of the planet until it became unbearable and Spock commed Mccoy.

It was _not_ a pleasant experience.

That said, Jim decided it would be wise to bring the doctor along on this one.

It was also extremely amusing to watch Bones try and be polite to the natives, he had to admit.

Carol ended up being added along to the rest of their foursome, because Bones wouldn't go unless Jim swore on his wild libido that he'd convince Carol to come along. Jim just shrugged and abided by his terms, teasing the southern doctor about his 'obvious flirting'.

... Mccoy tossed him out of sickbay, threatening to stab him in the neck with a hypo full of a chemical that would leave rashes in some very … intimate places.

Anyhow, everything went basically according to plan; the team was beamed to the surface, and Jim steeled himself to meet the chief of the Vuritans, standing with his head held high and a bright grin on his face, Spock and Uhura on his left and right sides, and Carol and Bones off to the right.

…

The leader of the Vuritans was a very tall man.

He was taller than Jim and Spock, towering over both of them with ease. Jim estimated that he was probably _at least_ 7 feet tall, but he couldn't be sure. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Spock tilting his head up so he could meet the man's eyes, but otherwise looked unfazed by this tower of a man. Jim's lips twitched; but his grin still did not fade no matter how intimidated he felt by this man's height.

The chief's skin was a creamy bronzed color, framed by dark, shoulder-length, unruly hair that seemed to stick out every which way in certain spots. He had a soft, childish looking face, and Jim determined that he couldn't be very old, even though the Vuritans probably had a different aging-rate compared to that of a human's. His bangs were long and just as wild as his hair, going straight across his forehead and flowing downward, almost completely covering his eyes. Jim briefly wondered how Spock even expected to meet this man's eyes, because for a second there, Jim wasn't even sure if he _had_ any. One hard look later, he found them.

The sight he found was an amazing one.

The chief's eyes seemed to be a kaleidoscope of colors. Every time Jim blinked, the color seemed to change; from golden, to green, blue, and then back to gold again. Kirk couldn't pry his eyes away from the scene; he was too _drawn _to the dude's _eyes. _

After a moment of silence (and eye ogling, at least on Jim's part) the man finally spoke.

"Greetings Captain." He said in a small, quiet voice. He made for a small nod, wild hair flopping into his eyes, covering them. Jim momentarily snapped out of his trance, and then was shocked into a new one when the man spoke. Kirk didn't know that the Vuritans knew Standard.

He shot Uhura a look, to which she just shrugged, apparently just now learning this also. Jim moved his gaze back up to the leader as the man was moving his hair back in place, and Jim found himself drawn to his eyes _again._ They were just…alluring.

The man continued on, seemingly not noticing the fact that Kirk was basically gaping at him and his eyes, or he just didn't care.

"My people and I are very…..," he faltered, probably searching for the correct standard word. "…._ah,_ _excited _upon your arrival." He finished, colorful eyes dancing with childish glee.

After more seconds of dumbfounded silence, Uhura elbowed Jim in the side, and he closed his mouth, hand shooting to his side as he opened it again. She seemed to be mesmerized by his eyes also; Spock was the only one that wasn't. Or at least, that's how it seemed.

"Well that's great. Me and my crew from the _Enterprise_ are very honored to be here on behalf of the Federation." Jim said almost absentmindedly, as if he were under a spell. His hand flopped in Uhura's direction as a gesture as he spoke. "This is my Chief Communications Officer, Lt. Uhura, " Uhura nodded in greeting, "The woman off to the right is Dr. Carol Marcus, one of our science officers, and the man next to her is our Chief Medical Officer Leonard Mccoy." He blinked as Bones did a half-hearted wave in the leader's direction, covertly staring at Jim like he was crazy. When he faltered, Spock's gaze snapped to him expectantly, but Jim missed his taken aback expression.

"…..hm…..and this is Mr. Spock." He mumbled after a moment of mental fumbling. A few moments before, his mind went into an almost complete blank, like a computer rebooting itself. He could feel Spock's gaze piercing him, glued to him with something like uncertainty floating through them. Jim found that he couldn't respond to that.

He frowned.

"I am the First Officer of the _USS Enterprise._" Spock finished for him, tone sharp and gaze now untrusting as he gazed at the leader. If the unnamed man noticed, he certainly wasn't showing it.

In fact, he smiled.

It was a very….._unsettling_ smile.

Spock instantly didn't like it. At all.

"I am greatly pleased to be in your presence, friends." The leader said, clasping his hands together with that predatory-like smile on his face. He seemed to think about something, and his eyes shifted to an even _brighter_ shade of gold as he lifted a finger. "Oh, it would seem I have forgotten to tell you all who I am. How rude of me." He clasped a four fingered hand on Jim's shoulder.

"My name is-" he went off in a serious of smooth syllables and clicks, and Jim caught only a chunk of it, the rest going in one ear and out the other. It would have been too long to say in regular conversation anyway.

Uhura smiled her gentle smile at him, repeating the name with ease and receiving an approving nod. Jim on the other hand, just couldn't remember this if his life depended on it.

"Or you may call me L'uri." He stated, quietly, hands sliding off Kirk's shoulders, his multicolored eyes flickering over to Spock and then back to Jim's face. Spock had stiffened, looking at them both. Jim's gaze followed L'uri's, and what he saw in Spock's expression deeply puzzled him. Surely he was imagining it?

_Is Spock…jealous? _

Before Jim could ponder this anymore, or realize that this was the first coherent thought that processed in his mind since he met the chief, the latter blinked and stepped back, nodded to all of them, and grinned. He turned and swept his hands in a grand gesture. "Come, my friends, I shall show you to your quarters." And with that, he left. His walk a bouncy type of movement.

Jim blinked; clearly confused by everything that happened the last five minutes. Then he looked over…..

To find everyone staring at him.

"What?" he demanded, blue eyes searching everyone's face for a sign of _anything._ Bones was looking at him in what looked to be an inscrutable expression, eyes glued to the spot where L'uri had been standing. Uhura looked just as confused as Jim felt, Spock looked…..well, concerned, in his own way, and Carol just looked bemused. No one answered.

Without another word, he began to follow the leader (literally.) leaving, everyone behind to share a glance with one another before following behind silently.

_OoOo_

"I'm tellin' you Jim; that man has something creepy going on about him." Bones grumbled, shaking his head with his arms crossed. When Jim was shown to his room, he only had about ten minutes of utter silence and thought before Bones barged in and expressed his own grievances. He was now leaning on the opposite wall, 'brows furrowed and mouth in a tight frown.

"I just don't see it Bones. He seemed nice enough." Jim said almost defensively, crossing his arms. The young looking man _did _seem nice; he had shown nothing but friendliness and hospitality towards the crew. But something in the back of Jim's mind whispered it's protest; at the same time as seeming childish and innocent, the guy seemed kind of …loony. Jim honestly couldn't remember a good chunk of the conversation he had with him actually. Weird.

"Nice? Jim, the guy wouldn't take his eyes off of you, he kept smilin' with those sharp teeth of his, and you seemed to be hooked on his every word." Mccoy drawled, scowling at his younger friend. Jim just shook his head, letting out a breath in response.

"Spock seemed to be pretty put off by the two of you conversing. You seemed to forget he even existed when you were throwing out introductions." Mccoy went on, one hand now on his hip. Jim looked up at this, bewildered.

"I did?" he asked, leaning off of the wall and sitting in the chair that sat at a wooden desk.

"Yes!" Bones exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. "I don't trust that guy; it was like he was working some damn voodoo on your brain with his eyes. You seemed to be somewhere else while you were talkin' to him, almost like you were in some trance. Uhura and Carol seemed to be drawn in by it too."

"How come you weren't affected by his 'voodoo' or whatever?" Jim questioned, forming air quotes around the offensive word. Mccoy's lips twitched.

"Because I wasn't lookin' at him." He stated simply.

Jim ran a hand through his hair, taking a moment to absorb this. The fact that he had forgotten Spock disturbed him; it seemed almost _impossible_ to forget Spock. Jim was sure of it.

He had woken up with many embarrassingly inappropriate early morning….. Reactions and ex_periences, _due to some very _interesting_ dreams starring a certain First Officer. So, Jim managing to somehow_ forget_ Spock was weirdly concerning.

_Bones must be right_, Jim thought to himself.

"Your right Bones. Considering I don't remember half of the conversation I just held with the guy, maybe there _is _something….."He faltered, going into thought once again. His mind kept going back to the point where Bones said that he practically forgot Spock was even _there,_ and that he was distracted throughout the whole thing.

"Alright. That's good enough for me, but I'm keeping an eye on you for the rest of the time we're here capiche?" Bones asked, arms falling back to his sides. He seemed to think of something, then added "The Hobgoblin'll probably be watching too."

At that, Jim raised an eyebrow, almost in imitation of Spock, and looked up. He nodded in response, and with that, Mccoy left the quarters to presumably find Spock.

About an hour went by as Jim sat and simply_ thought_ until he came to a conclusion.

He was going to find Spock, and question him about _exactly how_ he interacted with L'uri, and get down to the bottom of this shit.

_OoOo_

Jim wandered around in the hallways of the place they were all staying, looking for Spock. It was a big, roomy, building in the center of their sizable vicinity, filled with at least a dozen hallways. The ceilings were high and airy, the walls wide and spaced. Everything seemed to be in a boring beige color; the furniture, the walls, the doors. It was making Jim sick;_ so much fucking __**beige**__._

He was having a bit of trouble locating the Vulcan's room, for there were so many doors and they all looked the same. After about an hour of wandering Jim had decided to just choose a door and walk in it, not caring about who he walked in on anymore.

….

After about 5 mentally scarring experiences later (and many slaps to the face), Jim came upon a door at the end of the spacious hallway, steeling himself for more slaps to the face. His mind considered the possibility of being assaulted again, maybe this time by a hot Vuritan chick…..no, bad. That wasn't what he wanted to think about at the moment.

Jim knocked on the door.

And he waited.

And waited.

Aaaaaaand….. Waited.

Right when he turned to leave, the door slid open with a quiet whoosh of breath.

"Captain." Came the smooth, soft voice. He turned and was relieved to see Spock on the other side of the door.

"Hi Spock…" he paused, "And right now, it's Jim." Spock already knew that, so why did he feel like correcting him? Jim internally shrugged, lifting a hand to rub at the back of his neck sheepishly.

"I hope I didn't like…interrupt you meditating or anything." He finished lamely. Spock just stared at him with a closed off expression, his eyes alight with puzzlement. He was wearing his black Starfleet issued undershirt, but other than that, appeared to be completely fine.

"It does not matter at the moment. I find the attempt I made at achieving a meditative state to be fruitless." He stated somewhat quietly, slanted eyebrows furrowing.

Jim's lips twitched downward at that, but he chose to say nothing about it.

"If you do not mind my asking; is there a specific reason you came to my quarters Jim?" Spock asked, assessing Jim's slightly reddened state and the four-fingered hand print that was left on his right cheek from the last encounter, eyebrows raised. His eyes danced with the beginning traces of mirth.

"Don't laugh at my expense." Jim shot defensively, crossing his arms as he rubbed his cheek with the offending mark. The brand stung under his gentle touch. Jesus – the women hit _hard _here.

"I am not laughing." Spock stated, lips twitching. He moved aside without complaint as Jim entered his room and the door swished shut, closing them into the same room.

They were in Spock's _room_.

Or at least, his _temporary_ room.

Jim took note of the fact that Spock's room looked exactly like his own, with the exception of several objects placed neatly around the room. Other than that, it was completely normal.

But still, Jim was in Spock's _room._

Kirk was not at all crept out by his mind's eagerness to point that out several times.

Forcing down the oncoming flush of embarrassment from his imagination's…..rather wild, vivid, thoughts, he stood in the middle of Spock's quarters, swiftly forgetting what he was saying.

"…Jim…?" Spock asked after several moments of pregnant silence. The aforementioned young man's eyes flickered toward his face, his thoughts coming to a halt.

"Yes Spock?" He asked quietly, eyes drifting now. Spock stood with his usual elegance, even in the privacy of his own room. Jim found his eyes wandering his every line and curve again- taking in everything that was _Spock_ in that one moment. It was almost as if his mind was hungrily assessing him, cataloging what he saw for later use.

Uh.

What was he talking about again?

"….going to enlighten me on the intent behind your visit?" Spock's voice came back once again as Kirk's mind tuned in to the outside world. He thought about this for a moment before sitting down on the edge of Spock's bed.

"Hm….oh, now I remember. What the fuck happened, Spock?" he questioned, maybe not-so subtly. Spock's head tilted as he thought carefully about Jim's question, his bangs flopping a bit in the process. He started to tap his foot, as if he simply wasn't thinking about it, before stopping abruptly, opening his mouth to speak.

"Clarify."

"I meant, what the hell happened out there today? I remember coming down to meet the chief, and he greeted us…..and then after that it's completely fuzzy." He finished, lips brought together in a thin line. Spock's gaze seemed to be calculating now, snapping over to Jim as he walked over to stand by his desk. He answered with his back facing Jim.

"I am not quite sure if I know enough to state a solid hypothesis as to what happened." Spock started, his fingers drifting over the desk.

"Give it your best shot."

Spock looked up at him – then proceeded to recount what happened during the exchange to Jim. Kirk listened intently, not saying anything until Spock finished. His thoughts were never-ending, filled with new knowledge on the event.

"So….I basically was acting completely strange?" he asked, to clarify.

"Precisely," Spock inclined his head, hands now lying on the wood of the surface; he looked over his shoulder at Kirk, who was staring intently at his back. "You seemed to be under some sort of trance; maybe induced by the strange ever-changing hue of the Vuritan's eyes." His voice was thoughtful. He never brought up the fact that Kirk forgot about him during the exchange. He left that as something to meditate on later.

"Wait….so all of this happened because of some dude's fucking _eyes?"_

"Affirmative. Though I would not have exactly put it in those terms, you got the 'gist' of it." Spock said dryly.

"Well the solution to this one is simple," Jim started, ignoring Spock's tone of voice. "I just won't look at those eyes of his." He shrugged then, allowing his own eyes to drift to Spock's.

"Indeed. Although I find I am unsure as to how this situation would 'play out' as you would say. You are required to see this man more than once over the course of the four days." Spock's eyebrow rose up at Kirk, his head once again tilted as he turned to face the young man. Jim's brow furrowed in thought.

"…..I could make something up?" he mumbled uncertainly, taking Spock's logic into account. What _would _he do? It's not like he can purposely avoid the man altogether; not only would that be considered extremely rude (he guessed) to the leader, but Starfleet would have his ass handed to him if he screwed this up. He'd never hear the end of it.

What to do?

He voiced this thought aloud to Spock, who simply gave a really _tiny_ shrug of the shoulders. It was there – just barely.

"Hm….maybe I should sleep on it." He said quietly, getting up to stand. Spock looked up at him curiously, eyebrow quirking in its usual arch. Kirk recognized that as his Questioning Face.

"Have you been able to achieve an efficient amount of rest Jim?" he asked, the Question Expression (which sounded _way _catchier, by the way) having not faded into Vulcan oblivion…yet.

Again with the question. Kirk realized he might be hearing this a lot from now on.

"Yeah, you could say that." Jim lied, biting his bottom lip while Spock's eyes narrowed slightly.

"Jim."

"I'm _fine_ Spock." He left it at that; not wanting to voice the truth about nightmares for him.

He had gotten through them without any help, so he sure as hell didn't need any now.

Head filled with the emotions from past dreams, Kirk walked towards the door, suddenly in a slightly bitter mood. He knew it was for no good reason; that's how James Tiberius Kirk's moods usually rolled when they took a turn for the worst.

Spock simply followed pursuit, eyes filled with an inscrutable emotion as he gazed at Jim, Dark eyes smoldering.

"Goodnight Captain."

"It's Jim –g'night Spock." He said quietly, moving through the door. Maybe he _did_ need sleep. He was starting to feel weird.

James Tiberius wasn't exactly happy then.

The universe is just too fucking confusing.


	6. Chapter 6: SPOCK

**Okay so, I must apologize for the delay. Spock is just so HARD to right. Jesus.**

**So, basically in this chapter we see Spock's side of things, and how he views his relationship with Jim, his** **_friend._**

**Also, there's sleepy times and subtle fluff.  
**

**you have been warned.**

Chapter six: _SPOCK_

Spock meditated that night.

This was a usual occurrence; in fact, he had tried, to no avail, at meditating approximately one hour and twenty-three minutes ago, before Jim approached him with inquiries of the day's diplomatic duties. He found he could not concentrate, which was admittedly infuriating in its own subtle way. Jim's interruption therefore did not prove an unwanted distraction. Although, Spock found he was perturbed by Jim's emotional outburst concerning Spock's query about his sleeping patterns and overall mental/ emotional health. After Jim had excused himself from Spock's room, the Vulcan immediately went into meditation, evaluating the day's events once again with the addition of what just transpired.

…His mind refused to focus on anything but the strange exchange between the captain and the leader of the natives, L'uri.

Spock had been disturbed by the encounter because of one or two reasons:

1.) The captain seemed greatly entranced by the Vuritan

2.) L'uri made Spock feel strong undercurrents of emotion_._

Needless to say, Spock was suspicious of the leader. He seemed to be doing something to the minds of Spock's other crew members that accompanied him and the captain on the landing party, and that unsettled the Vulcan on some degree. He knew, though, that he did not yet have enough evidence to conclude that this is indeed the intentions of said leader.

Keyword: _yet._

_Illogical,_ a small part of Spock's Being chided. He was aware of how irrational he was reacting, but for once, he ignored the small voice. Something told him that Jim, in all of his impulsive and illogical behavior and glory, would be proud.

At the thought of his human friend, Spock's mind began to wander, which he frequently tends to do when his concentration and _Katra _decided to dwell on Jim. The Vulcan usually did not intend to indulge in such a thing, but to his quickly clamped down dismay, he could not seem to pry his concentration back from where it ventured into uncharted (and maybe, undesired) territory.

Spock sat in this position for a few hours, well into the Vuritan night, until a PADD sitting idly on his desk pinged.

Spock slowly came back to the outside world after his sensitive ears picked up the small noise, his awareness of his surroundings coming back in segments. His vision came back into focus as he opened his eyes, and the rest of his body followed suit. He rose slowly, then approached the desk and lifted the PADD off of the flat surface, glancing at the screen as the light illuminated his face.

The message on the device read:

_ you up Spock? _

It was obvious who it had originated from.

Spock ran his dark eyes over the message once more, wondering briefly why the captain would be awake so late into the night. What did he want with the Vulcan at this time?

Spock decided to keep his reply simple after it occurred to him that, possibly, Jim had experienced another nightmare, and had just awaken from it.

_ Yes, Jim, I am awake. What do you require from me at this time?_

As he waited for Jim's next reply, he sat in the chair of his desk, posture as perfect as it usually is. Jim often chided him for being such a perfectionist and being 'too damn graceful' about everything he did. Spock politely disagreed, for he did not believe he was perfect, in fact, he believed he was _far_ from it. Jim expressed bemusement to this answer.

This had intrigued Spock.

Spock was not attempting to be modest when he had said this; he was merely stating fact. In the eyes of many, whether it had been the Vulcan High Council or his peers that had attended the Vulcan institute that he was enrolled in during his youth, this much had been utterly true; Spock was not perfect. Or at least, he was not the… Vulcan standard of 'perfect'. To some, or should Spock amend, _most _of his Vulcan peers at that time, he was not even at the level of satisfactory. One day when he arrived home from the institute, he told Amanda as much, and she had told him not to listen to the teenage males, stating that they were 'foolish'.

Spock heeded her words, but still found himself in numerous, violent, altercations.

So when Jim had stated he was a perfectionist, and that Spock was graceful on multiple occasions, the Vulcan felt some strongly illogical feeling swelling in his chest cavity, near where a human heart would have been. Much to his bemusement, he could not pin-point exactly what it was. His mind would have continued to ponder this notion, but he was interrupted.

_Ping._

_ ….._

Spock's left eyebrow made its way towards his hairline at the seemingly futile message. He was just about to point out as much to the captain before another message was received.

_okay fine Spock _

Another soon followed.

_you were right about me not sleeping well alright?_

_Ping_

_this is the third time tonite that Ive woken up and I don't think I can sleep_

Spock tilted his head at the reply he was just sent, taking in Jim's lack of punctuation, capitalization, and spelling. He was well aware that his friend was _very_ intelligent( much more intelligent than Spock had first thought) so he wondered, why exactly, did Jim always insist on this way of typing?

_It would seem that you have answered my query from our previous encounter, yet you have yet to have answered the second. What is it that you require Jim?_

Spock had answered truthfully; he actually_ was_ very curious as to why Jim had messaged him. He had not done so before, after experiencing a nightmare.

_wow Spock,could you be anymore straight-forward? Wait –don't answer that._

There was a halt in messages for about 10.02 seconds.

Then…

_could you maybe….come hang out with me….I mean, I know you weren't asleep, and you had said before that meditation wasn't working so well earlier…_

_Although the offer is intriguing, I must ask; why have you chosen me for company? I am sure Doctor Mccoy would have been obliged to carry out such actions._

_are you fucking –no, god, spock, Bones would beat me to death if I woke him up this LATE at night. plus, youre more fun to be around…dont tell him I said so_

Spock paused at that.

His eyebrows furrowed together. Did the lack of sleep somehow impair Jim's mental capabilities?

If you asked any other human, Spock was sure that they would not classify Vulcans with the term fun.

But…..

Jim was not any other human. He was…different.

_I fail to see how I am in any way associated with the human term 'fun'. _

Both eyebrows had now ascended his forehead as he pondered what, exactly, Jim considered _fun._

Besides, putting oneself in danger frequently, causing irritability in most individuals, and indulging in the now-occasional sexual/drunken escapade?

Spock could not arrive to a satisfactory conclusion.

_oh c'mon, don't be like that_

_call me crazy, but I actually ENJOY bickering with you sometimes_

_youre not COMPLETELY stuffy spock_

Spock developed a frown in between his eyebrows as he considered the implications of Jim's statement.

_ Was that to be taken as a compliment?_

_oh my god spock_

_okay_

_yes, it was a compliment_

_so are you coming or not_

Spock took a moment to mull over his final decision before typing.

_Very well. I will arrive in 3.4 minutes._

He sat the PADD back down on the desk, and went to go put on his socks, feet having been bare while he was meditating.

_OoOo_

Spock arrived at Jim's door at the exact time he had told him to expect him, wrapping his knuckles ever-so-softly on the door (since there was a lack of a buzzer), to announce his arrival. About 3 silent minutes passed before Kirk opened the door, bright blue eyes peering at the Vulcan outside of it.

"Hey." Jim mumbled quietly, opening the door as wide as possible, and then stepped aside.

Spock had opened his mouth to reply, but he paused as he took in Jim's appearance.

….He did not look well, to say the least.

The younger man's hair was bedraggled and untidy, the strands appearing to be sparkling with perspiration. His skin took on a pale hue, save for quite a few splotches of pink/red, coloring his cheeks in uneven amounts, contrasting the dark circles developing under usually bright, mirth-filled eyes; which were now brimming with an emotion Spock couldn't quite name. Further inspection led Spock to the conclusion that Jim had been _crying,_ evidenced by the tear tracks staining his cheeks and watery looking eyes.

"Spock…?" He asked, voice tinged with something akin to uncertainty as he shifted from foot to foot. Spock's eyes flickered over Jim's face, and it took Spock 3 seconds to realize his mouth was still ajar and he was still standing stiffly outside of Kirk's door. He quickly shut his mouth, pressing his lips into a thin line before stepping over the threshold of Jim's room. The room was still pitch-black, save for the light of the stars glittering in space.

As if Jim was following Spock's thought process,(which he very well might have been) he commanded the lights to about 15%, which left the room slightly aglow. It was just enough lighting so they could both see each other, but not bright enough to cause discomfort.

They were both silent as Jim sat on the edge of his mattress, Spock standing a few feet nearby, hands clasped behind his back. Finally, after a long moment of complete silence, Jim spoke.

"So, I'll just start by saying I'm sorry for not being honest earlier." He said, eyes lowered to where his hands were placed on his lap. Something about his stance made Spock uneasy. Jim was nearly curled into himself, knees now drawn in tight to his chest, arms wrapped around them to keep himself rolled up. His blue eyes peered at Spock, still watery and glistening.

….It was so…surreal.

Spock had never seen Kirk like this. He seemed vulnerable. Until now, Spock had honestly found it difficult to associate his friend with the words 'vulnerable' and 'fragile'.

_Yet here he was…_

"There is no need for an apology." He stated simply, taking a slow, small step towards Jim, as if he were a wounded animal. Because, Spock did not know the proper protocol for dealing with a seemingly broke captain. Jim's gaze bore into him searchingly.

"Yes there is. It isn't _your_ fault I'm having fucked up nightmares about psychotic super-humans trying to kill everyone I know and even _love, _not to mention that I snapped at you hours ago for being worried about me." Jim finished, uncurling from fetal position.

"I was not -"

"Okay, right, I know. You weren't worried. Vulcan's _don't _worry. I get it." Jim held up his hand to stop Spock mid-sentence, tacking on the '_I get it_' at the last second. Spock's eyebrows furrowed together.

Spock didn't grace that with an answer.

Jim sighed, shifting his weight on the bed beneath him so he was now facing Spock directly, feet now touching the floor. His arms were now spread upon the bedspread, fingers gripping the sheets.

"….You just gonna stand there?" Jim mumbled, lips tipping upwards into a small smile that seemingly just appeared at of nowhere. Spock felt something in him twist at the gesture, which he quickly pushed down. "Or are you going to sit down?"

Jim patted the bed next to him, having slid over to make room for his Vulcan companion. Spock's eyes narrowed marginally, his brain going over the options presented to him.

On one metaphorical hand, he could sit with Jim until the younger man fell asleep, and guard him from his reoccurring nightmares.

On the other…..

Spock takes pause.

There _was_ no 'other hand', _was there?_

His mind could not come up with something that needed his immediate attention, and for some odd reason, Spock felt a weird twinge (of…s_atisfaction? Illogical)_ at the thought of protecting Jim from his fears. And to his gaining surprise, he let it remain. So he sat on the mattress, smoothing out his Starfleet issued sleep – wear, and lifted his long legs onto the bed with him. Jim was watching his every move.

Spock chose to ignore that.

Jim shifted next to him, the mattress moving and then falling back into place as he lies flat on his back, turning his head to look at Spock. For awhile, they say nothing.

Spock's position shifted in the minutes that past (twenty-one minutes, to be exact, of complete silence) and then said silence was interrupted by Jim's abrupt yawn. Spock looked next to him to see Jim was closer than he had been twenty-five minutes ago, and he looked sheepish, as if he hadn't meant to give himself away by yawning. He covered his mouth with his hand.

"Captain."

"Jim."

"_Jim,"_ Spock amended, letting out a puff of air dangerously close to a sigh of fond exasperation. Jim caught on and gave Spock a genuine grin before Spock continued. "perhaps it would be prudent if you now got some rest." Jim frowned at that.

"But….fuck, Spock, I don't want to have to experience that shit again. There's only so much I can take y'know?" he grumbled, fiddling with the hem of his T-shirt. "What if I have another one? I can't help but feel that one day these nightmares are going to drive me up the wall."

Spock raised his eyebrow, but did not comment on the obvious figure of speech. The more he spent time in Jim's company, the more he picked up on human colloquialisms and sayings.

"There is no need to worry; I shall be here to awaken you should you suffer from night-terrors."

At that Jim chuckled. "Night-terrors?"

Spock felt the illogical urge to roll his eyes. He did not.

"Go to sleep Jim." Was all he said. Jim stuck his tongue out at him, but otherwise did as he told him to, curling up next to Spock and drifting into sleep.

Spock watched over him throughout the silent night.


End file.
